Break-ups require a 12-step program, I’m convinced of that.
May I re-phrase?
Break-ups with those you truly loved from the soul. Not a casual dalliance or a superficial connection, whoever chooses such options. But a committed, vulnerable and willing connection with whom you’ve parted.
It’s damned awful. Right?! We all pretend we’re ok – and in reality, we are if we step back and take control of our emotions. We’re stronger than we think. But it is painful, uncomfortable and miserable – truth be told. Continue reading “Love Detox 101 – For all those struggling to let go. It’s not easy.”
“Cry. Forgive. Learn. Move on. Let your tears water the seeds of your future happiness.” – Steve Maraboli
Daily thought: As sad as it may be, sometimes you have to accept the fact that certain people we called friends – are friends no more.
Point to ponder: Though we never give up on friends, sometimes we need to step away. Sometimes we need to evaluate if someone is still a friend – that person we could see in five years, despite no communication, and still feel close to and share a connection, as if no time had passed. Or, if we are holding on to something that has long since died, not publicly declaring an ending.
Soulful reflection: I have both. Friends I know are friends no more, and friends that I would call tomorrow, despite how much time has passed, who I trust would be there in a heartbeat.
But how long do we ‘friend’ people who don’t reciprocate our friendship? How many years do we put forth love, kindness and care – when they don’t return it?
Know when to say when. Frankly, I’m in that stage of life when I’m packing carefully who is growing with me through the years, and who I am leaving behind.
Don’t get me wrong. I’ll still be there for you, no matter what, no matter what time of day or night. Even though that may mean nothing to you after your needs are met. I’ve experienced that one too many times, but as my mother reminded me tonight, I can feel proud in my friendship status and offerings. I’ve been a friend, even when many have not. Maybe they don’t have it to give. That’s ok.
But don’t be surprised when I fade into the sunset in the future. When the birthday card and wishes or text messages stop. I’m tired. And I’m moving on from you. The you who isn’t present in my life.
What does friendship mean to you?
Fiery love and torturous break-ups, tumultuous ups and downs, stops and starts. Lonely days and nights filled with nothing but endless heartache and longing. Angry periods filled with rage, hurt and venom.
These stories resonate with many, me included at one time. I sought out such articles and eagerly absorbed each word. I wrote such articles, my heart bleeding onto the screen with each keystroke, another tear falling from my eye.
Over time, the tears dried up and the acute heartbreak that once consumed me, became a dull ache that flared here and there. The severity of my symptoms would depend on the memory, the current state of mind and how volatile my mood. Many of these times could be analogized with a yo-yo, winding up tight, then slowly releasing. Continue reading “When you miss the one you love – even though it’s over.”
I’m not sure there is anything as painful as loving someone who didn’t, or couldn’t, love you in the way you needed.
What’s even more painful is when that person did love you as you needed – then stopped.
Continue reading “Heartache – my old friend.”
“You can’t possibly embrace that new relationship, that new companion, that new career, that new friendship, or that new life you want, while you’re still holding on to the baggage of the last one. Let go… and allow yourself to embrace what is waiting for you right at your feet.” – Steve Maraboli
How often do we find ourselves saying, my heart is heavy?
If you didn’t read it here, visit The Elephant Journal today.
“There are things that we don’t want to happen but have to accept, things we don’t want to know but have to learn, and people we can’t live without but have to let go.” – Anonymous