Love Detox 101 – For all those struggling to let go. It’s not easy.

Break-ups require a 12-step program, I’m convinced of that.

May I re-phrase?

Break-ups with those you truly loved from the soul. Not a casual dalliance or a superficial connection, whoever chooses such options. But a committed, vulnerable and willing connection with whom you’ve parted.

It’s damned awful. Right?! We all pretend we’re ok – and in reality, we are if we step back and take control of our emotions. We’re stronger than we think. But it is painful, uncomfortable and miserable – truth be told.

You may not need to go to meetings or seek any therapeutic options, but you do need to be mindful, aware and honest.

It’s painful when you love someone – yet the two of you can’t make it work. Or worse, you realize that person may have been a fraud all along and – you fell for it. You want to believe their intentions were sincere, yet you’ve learned that may not have been the case. In that moment, you feel like a fool. Your anger rises, your heart breaks, and you are frankly piss$% off.

You find yourself having a moment and loving that person so – then having to rewind and unreel all of those feelings. Doing a fact check and remembering that if they wanted to be with you, they would be. There is no reason why they wouldn’t be – right?!

There are times someone needs to set forth on their own to achieve their personal goals, fulfill an aim that they can’t cast aside. And I’d like to believe that a couple could survive that – unless one partner doesn’t want to.

So – ladies and gents – be gentle with yourself but be honest about the situation.

Though you want to be with that person and resent the fact that s/he is not with you, rewind and replay.

If your relationship was important to that person, you’d be together right now. And you’re not.

And it angers and upsets you that others want to love you, but you can’t let go of the one you love.

How do you let go?

You let go when you acknowledge the fact that person isn’t coming back – and may not have even been there in the way you believed- that’s what makes your brown eyes, blue.

Recovery, a way of life from all things troubling.

Be true to yourself. What’s meant to be – will be. Trust that.


Author: E.M. Murphy

A voracious writer, lifetime learner and eternal seeker who aims to open minds and hearts. Armed with a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology and a NASM Certified Behavior Change Specialist, humanity and humor is at the heart of my writing, reminding us that the key to success will always start with a genuine concern for others while making sure to be true to our authentic selves.

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