I walked into my parent’s home tonight when my mother presented me with a card. She asked me to read the front before I opened it – ok. I went to open it, “are you done?” to which I answered “yes,” – then opened to read the message within.
My mother broke down. I broke down. It was from my aunt. My aunt who so suddenly, and unexpectedly passed, in January. The sentiments of the card were beyond beautiful. And it was the first time my mother and I fully expressed our grief and sadness. With everything going on. With standing strong for others. We finally released our sorrow.
Sadness isn’t a strong enough word to express my grief. After my father’s brush with death, I froze. My parents just went home after living with us for five months. I entered the second bathroom to hang some laundry and broke down – it was too neat, too clean, too perfect, I hated it. I longed for that mess that was once was, though I’m so thankful that my folks have their independence back.
When my father complains, I’m quick to remind him that he’s alive – and his younger sister is not. It’s painful in a way most cannot imagine because of how we hold it together. I ache. I suffer. I mourn. We all do.
Cherish each and every day with your loved ones. Be there now. Love unconditionally. You will never regret that.
Auntie Lala – feel our love, always. We miss you more than you’ll ever know.
I expect you to call every day – 💔
