The Christmas season is in full swing, yet this year isn’t particularly jubilant for me. There has been much loss and many stressors, thus the holidays simply evoked a feeling of heaviness, additional things to add onto an already taxed existence.
Yet I am wise enough to recognize when something is off, or when my feelings are getting the best of me.
I wanted to decorate for the holidays – but at the same time, I didn’t. It seemed rushed this year, short in duration. I am a decorate on Halloween for the holidays kind of gal to ensure one quarter of pleasure – November, December, and January – savoring the season. This year didn’t allow for that and frankly, I am tired – or maybe a bit lazy when it comes to what should be enjoyable.
Then some encouraged me to skip Christmas, asking “Why? You’re not hosting or entertaining this year. Don’t bother! You’ll only have to take it down.”
The irony is when it comes to decorating or many aspects of how I act out my life, never has it been for someone else. I don’t clean for company or ensure everything is perfect for guests. My fine china (I also love paper plates) isn’t for special occasions and displays aren’t for show. I put forth my best effort simply because I enjoy it. I take great pleasure in the little things, like basking in the light of my Christmas tree and enjoying the bright, merry shade of red that dons most rooms of my home. The aroma from candles fills my senses and soothes me, mesmerized by the flicker of a flame as the cold air wafts through an open window and the warmth of a blanket comforts me.
How I love this time of year, as well as the winter season, and how close I came to skipping it completely.
As for Christmas, I may not have done much, yet I’ve done enough. It started with the few things I’d stored in a closet, which resulted in a lot.
As I unwrapped each and every piece of Christmas decor, I smiled. From year to year, we may forget what we’ve collected, each piece accompanied by a memory.
What a wonderful trip! Reminiscing may be bittersweet, yet it’s beautiful in its own way. You laugh. You cry. You question. You reflect.
So over the past weeks, I slowly and hesitantly decorated for Christmas. And tonight, when someone asked me, “Why?,” I replied, “Because I love it.”
Do it for you.
